Ok, I would totally be lying if I said I understand whey ALL guys feel the need to stay friends with their ex girlfriends  (and no this didn’t come up because of the run in last weekend - that ended a long time ago - this is for a friend of mine).  Just like having an Ex-Box, I don’t get it. They all say that they make better friends than girlfriends, but is it really that important for guys to have an ex-girlfriend be their BFF once they’ve got a new girlfriend? I’m not saying that guys shouldn’t have friends who are girls, but there is a fine line between being just friends and a little more than just friends. If you are dating a guy that goes to confide in his girl/friend for everything under the sun, that’s probably not a good sign, especially if the two have ever dated. I would say most of the time when guys confide in their ex’s about anything, the current GF gets trashed at some point. “You two want to get a dog? You can’t be that serious about her and if you two break up who gets the sweet puppy?” “You’re moving in together? Isn’t that moving a little too fast?”  “Why would she think you would want to do something like that? Even I know you better than that.” She knows she can’t come right out and talk bad about you because that will make bad, so instead she’ll be sneaky about it and try to get your guy to think twice about what you two have already decided. She wants to make herself look like she was the most wonderful girlfriend in the world and make you look like garbage.   And when she calls to ask him if he wants to grab lunch or dinner, you know just something so the two of them can talk and catch up, RED FLAG! His ex should never have anything to say to him that she wouldn’t want you to hear. If she respected your relationship in the first place she wouldn’t want the two of them to have a private lunch date. And as far as your boyfriend goes, if he runs out the door telling you he’s meeting with her on his way out, he’s probably not the best boyfriend int he world.

In the end, it’s all about respect. If ex GF can’t respect the fact that the two of you are together now and she doesn’t have snowball’s chance in hell, he needs to end the friendship. If he tells you he wants go out out with her but the only reason he doesn’t is because of the consequences he’ll have to pay, bad idea. You need to figure out why he wants to go out with her in the first place, and if the answer is just to catch up, then you can get 20 friends together, call her and you can all go to a bar, that way he can catch up with her and you can watch them both  like a hawk.  If you’re in a really good relationship, your boyfriend will have no desire to hang out with his ex-girlfriends (thanks love ). Maybe the issue isn’t why he wants to maintain a relationship with her, but why he doesn’t care enough about your relationship to bring copious amounts of stress to it when you have to over hear the two of them talking on the phone.